20 July 2010, 9:18 am
During the Civil War many people influence the outcome because of being such great Heroes. Well only one of these people actually did something. This person was a man amongst men it is just a shame that he was killed. Jesus was probably the main factor why the Civil war was fought the way it was. Not only was Jesus super cool he was really smart. Jesus was born in 923 about the time of the roaring 20’s or when you were born Btw did you go to school with him?). So anyways everyone knew Jesus was something great. When he turned three he mastered the pogo stick everyone knows how damn hard that thing is. Shortly after he was bore with it, so he brought a bike. One day he was out on this nice bike he just spent a lot of money on and some black guy stole it out from underneath him. He ran after him for a few hours screaming, “nigga stole my bike!” no one did anything at all. This is when he knew it was time for a change. He quickly learned that black people don’t steal scooters. So he asked Marty Mcfly could bring him one from the past because those things died with president Clinton. He got his scooter an rode it from springfield New York all the way to Olympia, Washington, that’s like 5 billion miles that’s a lot even for an airplane. Once he got their he came up with a plan this plan seemed crazy it was called the non-violent protest. He sat around for days until someone just told him he could have the government. He decided that the black people needed to stop stealing bikes. Because of this the Civil War broke out. The Civil War was between China and Pakistan. The people fought for about fifty years. The war was finally ended in 2020. But only because china was like Jesus we are out of ammo, Jesus simply replied “What do I have to work with” he only had a banana, 15 seconds later he developed the atomic bomb, an rope it on Pakistan an killed a lot of people. The people thought Jesus was moding so they quit and joined a new server. Once the war was over Jesus was hit by a car, and with his last breath he said “warship me!” and died. As you can see without Jesus the world would be a terrible place. All over the world black people would be stealing your bike. So without him, we all would be helpless. -Taken from the Landober Baptist Church 1923* NOT 923... Read More »
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